back to the charting board




After a long day of travel in Indonesia.  ...this is how I feel today.

 
I'm tired.  Like dog ass tired.  At first I thought it might be the weather.  Than I thought it could be 'that' time of my cycle.  Than I thought maybe it could be because my schedule is getting busier.  I'm sure it's a combo of all three.  But also the fact that I've been eating like shit, going to bed late and getting up later and have been missing my morning yoga practice.

During my Energy month I was feeling great!  I was following my intentions, loving ticking things off and truly had more energy.  I thought that I could just keep it up without the daily reminder.  But the only thing that has stuck is improved dental hygiene.  I am now a regular flosser...my dentist would be so proud.

So, back to charting.

So far this month of relationships hasn't been the most successful.  Probably because I've been so tired and lazy.  Which, I should tell you are not the best ingredients when you're living with someone who is also tired and you're both trying to work on your relationship.  But, we're trying.  And have agreed that our relationship deserves two months.  So this will carry over.

I came across this great article on Elephant Journal about relationships and will add some of this in too.

The Whole Point of Every Relationship (is probably not what you think it is).

Anyways, did a big grocery shop with lots of veggies so this should help the three servings.  Also, changed my schedule around a bit so that my early mornings are free next week so I can get my yoga on!!!  It's amazing how being tired can affect everything.  Need to remember to always watch my energy levels!

~peace :)

marriage is like a team of horses

me and my parents at Bugolksa S. Korea

Yesterday was my parents 40th anniversary.  That's right, 4-0.  It's a big red ruby anniversary that was celebrated with family, food and one too many drinks.  For their present I put together a scrap book.  A lovely idea, and one that they really appreciated.  A lovely idea that ended up taking me hours and hours to put together.  I had no idea scrapbooking would be this hard.  *note to self ~ next time you think it's a good idea to make a scrap book for someone, remember - it's not.

Anyways, as I went through the photos for the book, it was like watching my parents grow up together.  Literally grow up together, they were 19 when they were married.  The love that they share for eachother is so clear in every picture.  My parents have been amazing role models for me and my brothers.  And at dinner the other night as my dad handed my mom a ring shaped box, the look of surprise and awe and absolute adoration that flashed under batted eyelashes from my mom to her husband made all of our hearts flutter.

For this scrap book I asked their family and friends to write in stories and memories for my parents.  The emails that came in were amazing and showed how much they're loved.  They were likened to Romeo and Juliet by friends and a good team of horses by family.  As the story goes, my great grandmother used to say that a good marriage was like a team of horses, you could only move forward if you pulled in the same direction.

With all this love and committment on my mind, it seems fitting that this month - in my no shit experiment - will be all about 'relationships'.  Not relationships in general, just one relationship really.  The one that consists of me and my homeboy.
side note~ yes, I am still doing this experient...last months theme of finances just didn't leave me with much to write about... not a topic I've really taken an interest in, but one that I did need to focus on and learn some basic principles...which I did...so now on to the fun stuff.

Relationships!!!

Here are some ideas I think might help to strengthen our relationship:

1)  Just do it ~ if there's something that I want to do, I can't always wait for the man to want to do it too...and then feel resentful when we miss out.  If I want to do it, I should just do it.
2)  15 mins of quiet together ~ I know this doesn't seem like much, but as I was writing it down I thought "how are we going to manage this?"  This means 15 mins a day just the two of us, no t.v., no books, no ipad...just a chance for us to sit, lay or whatever together in quiet and enjoy eachother.
3)  Proofs of love  (idea from the Happiness Project)~ leave notes, texts, hugs, kisses, anything as reminders of our love for eachother.
4)  Follow through ~ no matter how big or small, if I say I'm going to do it, then I'm going to do it.  If I say I'm going to wash the dishes, I'm going to wash the dishes.  If I say I'm going to clean our pad from top to bottom, cook dinner and give him a fully body massage all while reciting Shakespear from memory, than that's what I'm going to do.  No more putting our relationship and things around our relationship on hold for other 'important' things.  We are the important things.
5)  1x per week activity together; yoga, hiking, rock climbing, whatever.  Something active and out of the house.
6)  Read If the Buddha Married.  Give the homeboy the coles notes version
7)  Honesty ~ speak and act from a place of truth.  Sometimes we sacrafice our own truth as a means to avoid hurting the other.  And in the end, we both get hurt.  Honesty first!!

Just like a good horse, I ran these by the man and he is 'on board'!  Now let's see just how fast we can run together!!

Any ideas to help build a stronger/healthier relationship?  Please leave in comments.

money money money mo-nay

This month is all about finances.  And although watching every dollar come in and out most likely will not make me happier, at the end of the day actually dealing with my finances might.

For years, my parents would sit me down to have 'the talk'.  No this talk was not about the birds and the bees, I knew about that.  This talk was about money.  My eyes would glaze over, Salt 'n Peppa's Shoop would play on repeat in my head and 'the talk' would end with me just walking out the door.

Student debt, a maxed out credit card and a struggling yoga teacher's salary does not a happy budget make.  But for the first time ever I'm excited to tackle my bank account.

If last month is any indication, writing out a chart of my resolutions will help me to make better decisions throughout the day.  Through writing down the things I thought would give me more energy and then tracking them at the end of each day, I've become a conscious choice maker. 

With the intention of being out of bed by 7:30am, I set my alarm in the morning to get me up and get my day going even if my first class isn't til noon.

If I know I don't have time to get for a long walk during the day, I leave a little bit earlier so that I can walk to and from work. 

Every time I go to make a meal, my chart flashes to mind, and that box beside '3 servings of veggies' is just screaming to be checked.

On the other hand, saying yes to that fifth glass of wine at the end of the night probably not the best idea, but at least I'm aware of the fact that I'm making a decision to drink that fifth glass of wine.  And when I feel  like shit the next day, I can clearly track it back to decisions made.

Already this week with each purchase I make, I'm running up the tally in my head to see if I'm within my budget; and then analyzing what's in my hand based on what I want vs what I  need.  Do I need new shampoo?  Yes.  Do I need a new sable coloured hand towel for the washroom becuase it's fall?  Probably not. Did I get it anyways?  Yes.  Again, just because I'm aware and making choices more consciously doesn't always mean that I'll make the right choice, just that I'm aware.

I'm going to keep up with my resolutions from last month, because I do feel like I have more energy and I think that those are resolutions I'd like to keep going for a long while.

This months resolutions with regards to finance are a bit different.  Some are daily and some are just things that I'd like to do within the month. 

Daily:
~ write down every dollar spent and what it's spent on
~ follow a daily/weekly budget
~ read one article about basic finance

Within the Month:
~ visit with a financial planner
~ read The Wealthy Barber (which I've already started and am actually enjoying.  An old Christmas present from my parents one year that was promplty tossed in a box.  I've had to borrow my parents copy)

So, will having more energy and a better handle on my finances actually make me happier??  I have no idea.  But so far having resolutions and making choices consciously is definitely making me feel good.

are you happy?

Are you happy?  This is the question posed by Gretchen Rubin in her book The Happiness Project.  Or more specifically: could you be happier?

I devoured this book in a couple of days, not becuase the writing was so good (it was okay), but because I've become obssessed with the idea of being happier.

A couple of months ago during yoga, as the class winded down into savasana the instructor said to bring someone to mind that could use a little extra love.  And you know who came to mind: me.  Like a five year old version of me.  I started crying.  Luckily the class was online through www.myyogaonline.com and I was in the comfort of my own home enjoying a very nice pants off morning.  Nothing like a good cry in your undies.

This got me thinking: a) I need more friends, b) I need to start taking better care of myself, c) I love what yoga can do

This book came to me - recommended by a student of mine- at exactly the right time.  I was breaking down.

"When the student is ready the teacher will come".  This is a buddhist proverb that Rubin talks about in her book.  This book, this idea of a happiness project has become my teacher.

This is how my happiness project is going to work.  Or as I like to call it "the no shit experiment"  As in; eating healthy will make you happier.  Uh, no shit.  Or, taking better care of your finances will make you happier.  Uh, no shit.  Or, cherrishing and having more sex with your partner will make you happier.  Uh,  not shit.  Etc, etc...

Each month will have a theme, and then within that theme there will be resolutions to help me to stay on track.

This month is all about Energy.

My resolutions, and these are daily, are to:
Eat three servings of veg/day
Have a green smoothie
Listen to music while getting ready
Do yoga
Get outside for a walk
In bed by 10pm (M-F)
Out of bed by 7:30am (M-F)
Floss

She suggests making a resoluting chart to help to keep you on track and to have a constant reminder of what your resolutions are for the month.

Mine looks like this:

But for those of you who are artsy or have any sort of computer skills it may look a little different.

So, who's up for this 'no shit experiment'?  In the words of Jerry Maguire..."who's comin' with me"?  repeatedly.

Happiness project or not here's a great way to have some fun.

Put on your favourite album, leave your yoga mat in the corner and just start to move.  See what comes up.  The freedom that comes from moving outside the confines of your mat brings up some exciting new sequences/dance moves. 

In my mind I look something like this:

I probably look something like this:

Hopefully it's somewhere in between.  Album of choice for me:  Ceremonials by Florence and the Machine!

Amazing!!!!!

Cheers to happiness!

ps.... my homeboy is doing it too!!

pps...pass it on to anyone you think could use a little extra happiness  http://happiness-project.com/